21-The Importance Of Being Able To Say "No"

Do you easily manage to say "No" to someone who wants a favour from you, while deep inside you feel you want to refuse?
Or do you, like I used to do for quite some time, roll across your feeling with a bulldozer and say: "Yes, of course .....", because you feel uncomfortable saying "No".

If you are prepared to follow the self motivation tips hereunder you will create healthier boundaries and with some self motivation exercise you will ultimately acquire the necessary self motivation skills.

I remember it took me quite some time to change from a person who wanted to please others, into a person who is consciously aware of what he feels and really stands for what he wants.

I used to waist far too much time with projects and activities that I really did not want to do. I was simply spending valuable moments of my time on other people's good opportunities.

My mentor taught me how important it was for me to become experienced at feeling what I felt, at questioning myself if this was what I truly wanted, and at saying "No" if it wasn't.

Learning to live our full potential also means that we have to learn to not always say "Yes" to what other people want. We can only move forward with our dreams and goals if we are focused on the things that will produce them.

My mentor made me decide on what I wanted in my life and what I didn't.
He convinced me to make these my personal policies.
If I didn't want to let friends borrow money any longer, then I had to make it my personal policy.
If I didn't want to discuss important business deals over the phone anymore, then I had to make that my personal policy.

In general it's not difficult to say to people what our policies are and we don't even have to say the word "No".
People tend to respect policies. And it's likely that no one will take them personally. They simply realize it's a healthy boundary you have set for all occasions.

It gets more tricky to say "No" , however, when what we are being offered sounds attractive.
How can we determine for ourselves what is a good choice and what isn't?

I have learned to put such opportunity in writing, close my eyes and ask myself the following questions:

First of all I ask myself: "Would doing this be in my highest option"?, and when I feel it is, I ask myself what kind of information I need to gather and what I would need to do to make it happen.

Next I compare that information with what I know about achieving my goals.
Is everything in line or is this opportunity leading me down a different path?
Is it harmonizing with the purpose I am passionate about, or does it simply sound better than what I am doing at that moment?

It's good to talk to a mentor or other advisors about potential opportunities and reflect on their knowledge and expertise. They can help to become aware of what's involved and they can help to stay focused on our goals and dreams.

After a couple of years of practice I have learned to stay focused on my higher goals and I have learned to say no to good opportunities that interfere with my higher goals.
I had to discover that I was not rejected for saying "No". Actually I noticed that people respected me for my clarity and drive.

You know, we are in control of how we feel and how we behave and express ourselves, and so are others.
That means that if other people get upset with you saying "No", well, that's their choice. Isn't it?

The Importance of Window Manufacturing in a Conservatory

Conservatories are personification of elegance. They place man in close contact with nature and increase the space available for use in a home. A conservatory is a comfort area in every way and its comfort level is decided to a very large extent by the type of windows it has got. It is windows that make all the light pour into the rooms and at the same time secure the building against intrusion as well as bad weather. The type of glazing used in the windows will decide how much ultraviolet rays the windows will block and how much light it will allow into the interior. As such, window manufacturing assumes a lot of importance in connection with these sunrooms.

In window manufacturing, wood or vinyl or aluminum may be used for the frames. Of these, aluminum windows are the cheapest, though they may not be the best bet from an energy saving point of view. Whether it will be useful for your conservatory or not will depend upon how much energy efficiency you require. If it is a three-season sunroom that you are unlikely to use in winter, energy efficiency may not be important. Or if you would prefer to have the windows open in summer to let in all the breeze and scent of flowers, again energy efficiency acquires less importance. In this case aluminum may be a good idea. But if you want the window to be energy efficient, vinyl will be the best choice. Wood is the costliest, and requires maintenance, though it is energy efficient.

Window rating is also important with relation to window manufacturing. Manufacturers assign something known as R-value and U-value to vinyl windows. A window's R-value denotes its thermal resistance or its power to prevent heat flow. For milder climates a lower R-value (e.g. R-11) might be all right but for a colder climate much higher R-value is required to prevent the heat from escaping through the window. This means that the windows might need better performing glazing. U-value is the reverse of R-value, and is a measurement of heat loss. For a window to be a more energy efficient in a cold climate, it must have a low U-value. Since one is the reverse of the other, manufacturers generally show only the R-value. Further, there is a lot of difference between the R-value of a glass at its center, and its R-value towards the edges. The matter will have to be clarified with the window manufacturing companies before opting for the right window.

Mobility of the window is also important. In a conservatory, all windows do not have to be opened. You can pre-decide which of the windows you would prefer to open, and which should remain fixed and request the conservatory company to customize the windows on the basis of it.